Not Fit to Print

There is shocking news out of Washington today: The Vice President said the "F" word to Senator Patrick Leahy of Vermont.

Or at least, I think he did, since the New York Times, where I first saw the news, was typically coy in reporting it. [link] The headline reads: "Salty Language as Cheney and Senator Clash", and the body of the article describes the interchange thusly:

Congressional aides said the argument occurred just after the photograph was taken. Mr. Leahy was mingling on the Republican side of the aisle, they said, when he spotted the vice president, who was included in the picture because of his role as president of the Senate.

Mr. Leahy approached Mr. Cheney to chat, the aides said. When Mr. Cheney recoiled, Mr. Leahy made a jocular remark, on the order of, "What, so you won't talk with Democrats?''

The vice president is said to have replied that he did not appreciate Mr. Leahy's personal attacks on him. Mr. Leahy, in turn, told Mr. Cheney he did not appreciate being called ''a bad Catholic''- a reference to Republican accusations that Democrats on the Senate Judiciary Committee were "anti-Catholic'' because they refused to confirm a judicial nominee, William H. Pryor Jr., who opposed abortion. Mr. Leahy is the senior Democrat on the panel.

At that point, the aides said, the vice president turned and stalked away, using an obscene phrase to describe what he thought Mr. Leahy should do.

The key phrase here seems to be "an obscene phrase to describe what he thought Mr. Leahy should do." Now, I'm just guessing, but it sounds like the Vice President invited the Senator to engage in an act (physically improbable though it might be) of self-copulation. There. Was that so hard to say? Even kids could read that one and not immediately catch on, so what's the Grey Lady afraid of?

Of course, Newsday had fewer qualms about its reporting of the incident, although it did use dashes for certain letters in order to maintain its air of being a family publication. Here's how it described the incident: "Cheney then responded, "F--- off" or "F--- you," the aide said." [link]

I note, by the way, that if the Times' description is accurate (even though oblique), the latter of the two phrases cited by Newsday probably isn't correct, since it would be inconsistent with the transitive nature of the statement implied by the Times' description (i.e, that the Senator should do something).

Unless, of course, the Vice President was propositioning the Senator, which would be a much much much bigger story.

Special thanks to Bill for tipping me off to the Newsday account.