We are thankful for

My wife's family has a tradition of writing "We are thankful for ..." on small post-it notes and then listing all of things that we are thankful for. Certainly this year, we have more than our fair share of things to be thankful for. Sam is growing into more and more of a little boy every day, doing all of the things that a three-year old does, and every day with him is all about discovery. We're all relatively healthy -- Mom's brain cancer hasn't recurred, and she's survived far longer than the statistics said she should; Dad's training for a half marathon at the age of 65; Mimi is going strong at 83, and although Grandmom Gi passed away this summer, it's hard to say she hadn't lived a full life in her 94 years on this Earth.

But somehow, all of the celebration is still tinged with some sorrow. On the one hand, Tasha was elected to the partnership at an AmLaw 20 law firm, the culmination of nine long and hard years of working and striving and stressing, and ultimately, excelling. The fact that 200 associates started at the same time Tasha did, and she was the only one to be elected partner, says something about how much of an achievement this is. But at the same time, one of our best friends, who deserved to be made partner at the same time, was passed over. And more devastating than that, Tasha's mentor and friend, who had worked tirelessly to make her a partner, died unexpectedly the day after the official announcement. It's hard to imagine a bigger devastation to his family, to the Firm, and to Tasha. The fact is, Conor was larger than life, and had an unparalleled ability to make whomever he focused his attention on feel like the singularly most important person in the world. It was a stunning blow at a time when, by all rights, we ought to have been celebrating. But somehow, without him, any celebration would have been hollow.

And yet, it's still Thanksgiving, and we're in Santa Fe with eight inches of snow on the ground and the desert is achingly beautiful. The turkey is in the oven after five of us worked all morning on stuffing and cranberry sauce and sweet potatoes and mashed potatoes and beans and carrots and the rest of our feast. This afternoon, 16 of us will sit down around a table and laugh, and drink some wine, and share stories, and revel in each other. Even with everything going on in our lives, it's hard not to be thankful for that.